Quite often many singles in relationship base their definition of how strong their relationships are
on the attraction the feel for each or on the passion in the relationship. Passion like we already
know is not constant but keeps fluctuating, most do not realize that building and maintaining
quality friendship is more a predictor of a happy marriage that any of these.

One tool that relationship masters use to ensure that their relationship not only stay afloat but
thrives and grows is the quality of friendship they build and maintain. Friendship is an essential
part of the foundation of any successful marriage.

When couples who haven’t taken time to cultivate their friendship settle into the marriage, they
begin to realize that they have very little to talk about or do together, their attraction begins to
wane. If conscious steps are not taken is could be the beginning of challenges in their

Constantly working on maintaining friendship is a requirement for couples as all stages of
marriage who desire to keep their marriage fulfilling. It is not uncommon to find that in the mist
of fulfilling responsibilities that come with parenting, career/job, extended family, religious
organizations and so on, it is the couple’s time together that suffer.

It is very easy for couples to drift apart at this point, people are always changing or at lest the
conditions around them and their response to life issues keep changing, going long stretches of
time without connecting and updating one’s knowledge of their partner could lead to a couple
growing in different directions which could negatively affect the marriage.

Relationship Masters make their relationship a priority my setting out time each week to be together
alone. Often they make their time together a ‘no matter what happens event’ meaning except there is a
life or death emergency they would create a time to connect each week and honour it.

It did not matter what they did during their time together, where they went or what time of the day it
was as long as it afforded them the opportunity to connect, having conversations that revealed more
about each other and played together.

Laughing together is a huge way a couple can increase their marriage satisfaction.

Taking out not less than two hours in a week to do something together that you both enjoy,
having a conversation about each other’s present joys and/or challenges outside the
relationship, having fun together, flirting, asking and answering each other’s open-ended
questions and having a way to connect daily (connection ritual) are ways to ensuring a couple
maintains their friendship and ultimately staying in love for a life time.

Nancy Oblete

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